My whole life has recently just been ruined. To start me and girlfriend are extremely close to each other but for the past few months we have hardly been able to speak to each other, hardly see each other or anything but we now have to ability to live together with no problem or worry about anything which you might think well that solves everything. Then when the day comes then I go to get my girlfriend, she suddenly thinks that she can't because of her parents. I should say that her parents are the reason that we can hardly ever speak to each other or see each other, her mum is literally insane and her dad is a pretty much a 5 year old. My girlfriend literally fears them and is worried about what they will do even though obviously they can't do anything to her because she will be with me but I can't get her to realise that. She has arguments with her mum every day, she hardly had any food in the house and her dad like I said is like a 5 year old so is useless and makes it worse. She keeps saying she wants to come live with me but she won't because of the fear of what her parents would do even though like I said they won't be able to do anything legally at all. Now sometimes when I speak about living together she gets annoyed so how am I supposed to make her not scared of her parents? I have tried everything I can think of but she is very shy and not confident at all so I don't know how to make her realise. The only thing stopping her is purely the fear of her parents so if I can get rid of that fear or get her to just overcome it then our lives would be so much better but I have been trying for so long now and I don't know what to do anymore. Before anyone says it, yes we have had the police and other people involved and they did literally nothing.
Do you have the ability to just go live on your own?
If you do and she technically doesn't move in, she'll be able to come over and will get a feel of how life could be like and hopefully that gives her the nudge she needs
If you do and she technically doesn't move in, she'll be able to come over and will get a feel of how life could be like and hopefully that gives her the nudge she needs
Yes we have the ability to live very well or yes I could go it on my own but another problem is that your idea wouldn't actually be possible because her mum very rarely lets her leave the house on her own and when she has left without her mum knowing then her mum rings the police and reports her as missing. The only solution is to somehow make her not scared of her parents so that she can just leave and then it won't matter what her mum does because she would have moved out but I don't know how, I've tried everything I can think of.
Seems to me that she is not ready to make the step. Moving out of the house is a big step and even though she may not have the perfect life with her parents is still seems something troubles her mind to go.
You need to have a steady income and a plan before moving out. There are alot of things you need to make ready and don't think light about this. I also didn't have a great time when living with my parents but still took me some time before i moved out, this was not out of fear for my parents but out of fear of living on your own and not knowing how certain things go and what needs to be done.
You need to have a steady income and a plan before moving out. There are alot of things you need to make ready and don't think light about this. I also didn't have a great time when living with my parents but still took me some time before i moved out, this was not out of fear for my parents but out of fear of living on your own and not knowing how certain things go and what needs to be done.
Thanks for the reply, although of course my knowledge is also limited I have tried explaining to her the best I can how the first steps would happen as in actually moving out and sorting things out and whatever else.
Situation like these are dificult indeed. What you could try is write it down, make a plan on how you see things. Word sometimes are not enought to convince someone and especially when one i scared to take the step. Once you have written all steps down in a way for her to understand she sees an overview wich may help.
I did think about that but I don't think it would help because I have told her every possible thing I could think of and it's been going on for a while now. There are even more and more reasons for her to live with me but still hasn't yet.
Sorry to hear mate, then i have no idea how i could help you with this. Since you basic did everything possible the only thing left is for her to decide and regardless of choice let her know you respect her choice
Thanks for trying and yep I'll try to, I'm hoping that she'll realise but I suppose we'll see.Sorry to hear mate, then i have no idea how i could help you with this. Since you basic did everything possible the only thing left is for her to decide and regardless of choice let her know you respect her choice
I hope so too mate and keep us posted if you like, wish i could have been of better help as i can feel your pain in this